Last month I wrote about he losses we have from friends and family who have left this world. How important it is to grieve and accept the emotions as part of the process of life.
We also have other losses in our life, while not as obvious, they never the less effect our life if not acknowledged and resolved. Throughout our lives we have moves, we change jobs, we lose relationships- sometimes through hurt and sometimes just circumstances. Even good things in life- graduation, getting married- mean ending something else- being a student, being single.Even growing up and changing our outlook and opinions can produce a sense of loss. often overlook this truth. What happens is when we go through life these losses add up, then a seemingly tiny loss (or a big one) happens and we find ourselves overwhelmed in grief, and not understanding why. This one loss has triggered feelings from all the other times we have glossed over and not acknowledged the pain.
What suggestions do I have here? Glad you asked!
You don’t need to get bogged down in the mire with it. Acknowledge the grief. Start from a place of thankfulness. What are you thankful for in this old situation/relationship etc. Then,what can you be thankful for in the new situation. Sometimes writing these out or saying them outloud is better than just thinking them in your head over and over.
Beware your identity- So often our identity is defined by where we live, the job we have or even our relationships. If our identity is being the daughter, then what do we do when our parent dies or even when we must change our role to being the caregiver and do the parenting to them. We are not defined by our roles or location. Even when you move and lose your support, you are still the same person. Even if you have to adapt your outlook in your new life situation, you can do this without questioning who you are deep down. Love yourself in the process and give yourself grace in this crazy journey of life!